No Pennies, Just My Thoughts
"Whatcha thinkin' about?" oh I would love to tell you.
Hey look! It’s one of those list-style posts that people complain about. ANYWAY.
Protein
If I’m going to do anything, I’m probably not going to do a bunch of research first. The gym teacher who works at my school told me protein would help me with my raging hanger (shout out to my teachers out there who never have time to eat anything), so I started to put it in my breakfast smoothies. As a certified breakfast hater (I wake up at 4:00 AM and I don’t feel like eating then, leave me alone), I’ve come to appreciate being able to quickly chug a Fairlife shake before my morning coffee, so that said coffee doesn’t make my tummy hurt. But suddenly everyone I talk to is on the protein train, and it’s starting to give eating disorder. There’s just never going to be a world where I’m eating protein popcorn, protein bread, drinking a protein shake, and finishing it off with protein ice cream. Are y’all pooping okay?
A long commute: pros and mostly cons
I like where I work, for the most part. But I’ve been thinking about the time I would have back in my day if I wasn’t driving an hour in the morning and 40-ish minutes in the afternoon. It’s almost 2 hours of my day! 5 days a week! 10 hours! Oh my god! If you are looking for a new job and considering a long commute, I gotta say, I can’t recommend it. My husband lives 10 minutes away from work, and he can wake up at 6, get in a good run, eat breakfast, have coffee, get ready for the day, and still be at work by 9. Your life is not worth the extra pay.
The pro is that I get to listen to audiobooks like CRAAAZY.
Does aging mean I can’t drink coffee anymore?
My chest hurts sometimes (boo). When I tell people this, they normally freak out, and that’s fine. But I assure you I’ve had many X-Rays and heart tests and blah blah blah and essentially my doctor’s best guess is that I have too much caffeine and my chest muscles don’t love it.
Unfortunately, coffee is very much my morning ritual, and I feel so off without it. There was a two week period of my life where I wasn’t allowed to have caffeine because I had a concussion after being hit by a car in the crosswalk. I cared more about the loss of my precious coffee time then being hit by the car. So I deal with the occasional chest pain. Maybe someday I’ll try decaf. Maybe.
Getting older means becoming gross
Lmfao I should warn you that this is actually gross sorry, don’t read it if you don’t want to hear about gross things! I like to overshare! Anyway, at the ripe age of 28 I’m getting my tonsils taken out in June. It turns out, you can not experience something your whole life, and then one day your body can be like, hey, we do this now. For my body, that is tonsil stones (I bolded it because I need you to know they’re evil). Raging, huge, chronic tonsil stones that can only be removed if I shove my finger down my throat and push them out.
Tonsil stones are very common and very normal. A lot of times they fall out on their own and people don’t have much of a problem with them. Unfortunately for me, they cause bad breath, nausea, vomiting, throat pain, and lack of sleep. As soon as I take one out, more are sure to follow in its place in the coming week.
I usually don’t like talking about my tonsil stones because they are fucking gross, and make me feel fucking gross. I don’t like talking in close proximity to people when I have them, I don’t like kissing my husband, and I get paranoid that people can tell I have them even though the only way they would know that is if they stared down my throat and made me say “ahhhhhh”. But the thing with having a body is that at some point in your life, that body is going to do something Normal but Gross. Maybe we should normalize our bodies being gross and the things we do to help fix the gross things. I, for one, can’t wait to have surgery and eat nothing but popsicles for a week. GOODBYE TONSIL STONES.
Not hating sports
As an insufferable art kid, I was very much committed to the bit of hating anything sporty. Even today, I couldn’t tell you how the sport of football is played. But you know what I do love? The unhinged attitude of Eagles fans. Could I tell you the name of any baseball player? No, but I do love sitting in a stadium seat with a hot dog in my hand. I love wearing a little team shirt. I love saying “woo” at the appropriate time so say “woo”. What’s not to love? (Other than the gross display of — often heterosexual “manly men” — throwing a tantrum over a loss).
Maybe we should add an extra 2 hours to the day
I don’t have enough time for fucking anything (see the aforementioned miserable commute). Can I have a few extra hours? What’s the worse thing that could happen? If I had more hours, I could write you more blog posts about what I’m thinking about (which might be the worst thing to happen to some of you, who knows).
brooke i LOVED this style post. i felt the long commute bit so deeply. i recently started a new temp gig that's a lot of driving, the one pro is i'm getting loads of audiobook + podcast listening in!